Tips for Finding a Therapist
Like people in general, every therapist is different. We all have different working styles and philosophies, as well as individual personality traits and life experiences that affect how we approach our work. With so many therapeutic methods and an even larger variety of individual therapists to choose from, how do you decide which one may be right for you?
Perhaps one of the more obvious places to start is with the method of therapy that you would like to use. Most therapists draw from a variety of approaches and have a few that they tend to use most frequently. For example, I use a lot of cognitive-behavioral therapy, which you can learn about here, and psychodynamic skills (see here) in my work. Other therapists like to choose one method and use only that, such as a therapist that almost exclusively uses CBT or EMDR), a common treatment for trauma. If you have some idea of how you’d like to work, this may be a useful place to start.
Whether you have ideas about methods or not, perhaps an even better way to find a therapist is to think about that types of people you feel comfortable talking to. Research shows that the most important factor in determining who will do well in therapy is not the therapist’s methodology or even experience level; it is the quality of the relationship between the client and therapist (this link and this link). Therefore, while methods matter and some approaches have more research to back them up, it is absolutely crucial to find someone you feel comfortable with and trust.
How might you do that? Start by thinking about people in your life now that you feel drawn to, such as friends, or teachers/professors and coworkers that you particularly like. What do you like about them? Do they have anything in common? Do they tend to be male or female, or of a certain age, or have certain personality traits? While there are great, capable therapists from every demographic, finding the right one for you requires looking at your own preferences and experiences. For example, if you feel uncomfortable talking to men, finding a female may make more sense. Here are some questions to think about to get started:
Would you prefer a therapist who is older than you, younger than you, or about your age?
Are you more comfortable talking to someone who is male, female, or nonbinary?
Do you prefer a therapist who has a certain racial or religious background?
Do you prefer someone who is more introverted or extraverted?
Would you prefer someone who is more blunt and direct or softer and more supportive?
One final tip is to look at the therapist’s bio and photo on their website or therapist directory page and try to discern whether or not you would feel comfortable talking to them (you can find mine on my About Me page). I hope that these tips have been helpful to you and I wish you the best of luck in your search. If you are a Massachusetts resident and would like to explore working with me please contact me to get started.
